First Few Weeks

Oh gosh..
Baby Mia will turn one month old very soon!

Now while I am trying to figure out every little thing I do with/to her is right (or completely wrong), adjusting to a totally, completely, worldly-flip-over around lifestyle with a newborn baby, my little one is quickly growing and soon will be one month old.

How unfair.

I must admit, baby. In these past few weeks, there are days when I just want to break down and let out an enormous sob. Especially during those middle of the nights while breastfeeding, and more while trying (for an hour sometimes) just to put you back to sleep at 4 or 5 in the morning, only to be awaken again in less than 3-4 hours later. Now what's the point of sleep (or nap, in a matter of fact) when I'd be up again in such little time!!

So everyone mentioned how great breastfeeding and breast milk is for babies. No one mentioned it's a b***dy hard work! Let alone the loss of sleep, sleep, sleep! Day in, day out. Battling with after-birth pains doesn't help either. And there are days when I just don't want to go out. I just want to sleep every time the baby sleeps. But then I'd feel bad for Mama or Papa or Adik whom came all the way here to help with the baby but stuck at home with me. As crazy as it sounds, we try to take them out everyday or every other day. A sleep deprived, light-headed me, and an exhausted Daddy.

As much I had thought of and wished I could turn back time and enjoy this first month with you, I find time, stress and tension had taken over too much. Yet you've grown almost well into your first month. I don't think I've ever worked mentally and physically as hard as I had in the past few weeks with you.

So this is what parenthood is about.
A test to our unconditional love.

But it's getting better now that I'm slowly accepting that I won't be getting enough sleep for the next 865 years, and also Daddy and I have been getting up together in the middle of the night so I'm not alone. Ever since, I'm coping better and feel less stressful. Daddy sometimes cracks me up with your grunts and behaviours which makes this stressful period, a little less tense and much lighter. Usually you cry, I feed, then Daddy puts you to sleep. Then at 8 or 9am whatever time you wake up, I take you out from the room so Daddy gets to sleep in while I get on with the ever so daily routine of feeding, changing, bathing, cuddling and putting you back to sleep. This goes on every 3-4 hours. Sometimes you wouldn't want to be put down though you're already sleeping. So one of us will have to pick you up or cuddle while you get some daytime sleep.

So here I am.
zzz